The Personal Algorithm

We decided to avoid being a hustler, a con. We’re not going to be dishonest. We’ll put in the work. We’ll sharpen our skills and create new ones. We’ll be stand-up people.

In a way, our instincts tell us this level of personal integrity is harder to justify in a world in change.

So let’s define a bit of an algorithm around that kind of integrity. We’ll use it to weigh opportunities, decide our actions in moments of discomfort, and seek the people needing our help.

–

When given an opportunity:

If breaking our word costs us the opportunity, we keep our word anyway. This is costly because we’ll need to be selective about the promises we make. We’ll need to be good caretakers for the whole of our lives, and we’ll need to stay out of what we can’t look after.

If one option scares us more than others, we’ll take the scary option. This is costly because we’ll need to stretch ourselves away from comfort. We’ll need to create the habit of listening at the voice of our fear, so that it becomes a wise guide as opposed to a source to silence.

If a situation causes us to be defensive, we’ll pause to see clearly. This is costly because our ego won’t let up so easily, because our minds are conclusion machines. When we’re certain there are only two options forward, we’ll pause to look for a possible third. When a situation threatens our identity (“I am a…”), then we’ll try removing that label and see if we can still proceed. When we’re so certain of something, we’ll take a moment to seek the truth.

If joining causes a dependency relationship, we won’t proceed. This is costly because it requires empathy for both ends of the relationship: what we’re ready to accept, what the others are ready to accept. “Win-win or no deal” is the protocol to use. If either party is losing in the relationship, we don’t enter the arrangement.

If we can get closer to people in motion, we’ll take that option. This is costly because we might not have the skills to serve these people. Their demand might not be met by what we have to offer just yet. The proximity to people in motion, however, will act as a forcing function to build new tastes, new language, new abilities. Even more, we’ll build empathy for new kinds of customers, who want to make progress.

–

This highlights another possibility. Maybe this algorithm, and our integrity, will leave us without meaningful opportunities to take.

If no opportunity is worth pursuing, we’ll create some for others. This is costly because it creates a longer investment cycle, with uncertain returns. It means creating promises that are scary, it requires keeping our ego in check even more, it requires a strong sense of our independence (enough to give freely), and it requires seeking people in motion.

In the end, there is always someone to serve.